So tired..

Again, at home, sick, down with a bad case of flu & high temperature. I've got the whole week of sick leave - doctor's orders - I looked so 'dead' at the doctor's office, she said.

Is it because I visited a friend's family with one of the kids recently recovered from a flu, or was it meeting my friend in the evening right afterwards, whose child had also been ill? Or was it walking home at 3 a.m. in the rain on Saturday night? Even if it was light rain, I remember feeling quite cold as the walk home seemed endless, with no taxis to catch. I kinda hate this "Little Xmas" season.

Anyway, this sick leave is welcome relief - I've been working way too many hours this autumn, and have been exhausted, and tense, for several weeks already. However, the input has not been wasted, since many things are proceeding now pretty well. Maybe I was not able to achieve it all, but, then again, who is?

I include here pictures of boots I'd like to have - since I'm way too tired to take any pictures, all I do is sleep, sleep, sleep...sometimes I read a little also: just finished a rather hilarious book by Gigi Levangie Grazer called Maneater, which I bought in Calgary on a business trip (no, no shoes bought unfortunately, just one wonderfully violet bag of the softest Canadian leather). About Gigi herself, now there's a role model for any shoe enthusiast (I don't know if she's really crazy abt shoes, even though several shoes are mentioned plenty of times throughout the book, but at least she married off well enough to afford any of her choice). The book was ok, not anything you could call 'great literature', but entertaining - and lightweight- enough for a flight over the Atlantic.

Now that I'm finished with that piece, I'm doing two things: a) thinking of writing something a bit similar of my own b) concentrating on lovely book by Donald Sassoon on Mona Lisa, the painting. The former is just some play of a sick mind (literally!), whereas the latter is very, very entertaining - almost like reading a detective!

Otherwise, Saturday was quite nice, started by getting up around 1 p.m, followed by shopping tour of two hours or so, then an hour of tennis with my friend and the coach, and then sauna and dinner at my friend's house, from where I took a taxi home to quickly change, feed le cat and then rush into a nightclub where my friend was desperately expecting me, all alone, surrounded by men she did not want to get to know! I immediately bought her a drink when I arrived - that was by far the least I could do, having put her into the situation!

There was supposed to be some stand-up comedians performing; however, it all looked a bit dull so we decided to try something else instead. We ended up in an old jazz club nearby. It was crowded, but we felt terribly misplaced - too young to be there, a surprising feeling these days. My friend made a sarcastic comment about there being hope for decades to come, still. It was hardly a consolation. Things got even worse when minutes after our arrival, the band that was playing announced a change on the piano, none less than my former ex, the Jazz Pianist. Shit! He noticed me almost immediately, and things were not helped my being grabbed to the dance floor by some eager middle-aged man. I felt awful, I knew that my ex would think I'm trying to show off. Or something.

It took a while to get away from the man (only thing that helped was to point to him that my young 'friend' was on the piano - an immediate downer to someone of his age, or anyone: a former tennis champion and current jazz virtuoso is not an easy combination to most) and return to my friend. She insisted I go say hi to my ex during their next break. I opposed, since we didn't end it all with a whistle but with a blow (or something). Yet, as I soon saw him standing right behind us, I went over to exhange some words with him. Mistake. He was grudgy, and left almost immediately. Oh well, who cares, anyway?

Soon my friend already had to go home, her nanny was determined to leave at 2 a.m. I stayed behind, talking to a nice guy who didn't try anything. Quite a relief, even if such behaviour always leaves a girl feeling a bit odd. Of course, the Jazz Pianist would come there during the next break, since he thought I was with this guy and got jealous. We talked some, he told he got some nice grant, but got mad when I enquired about any girlfriend..and left.

Well, he still holds some grudges, it's easy to see, but then what: I never really understood him. I always liked his playing, so soft, and could easily recognize the change on the piano with my back turned. I could not help but think back to some of the good times we had, involving Russian champagne, a certain red dress, reclining on his grande piano, and, naturally - some jazz. In memoriam...I think I'll buy his solo album - the one for which I helped to pick the right versions of some of the pieces. I think I'll enjoy, listening. I prefer things the way they are, now. Come to think of it, my life truly has become a lot more enjoyable during the passing year, even if health-wise it has not been one of the best ones.

To end with, the last picture shows a very nice design of flowers gilted on leather boots. These boots would look their best in brown, worn with sleek or not-so-sleek skirts, or with jeans.

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ps. 1st, 3rd and 4th boots from Victoria's secret, 2nd from Dumond. I'd prefer the 1st in black or burgundy, the 2nd in black, the 4th in brown